Recently, we flew through a massive lightening storm when landing in Sardinia. 

For me, this is not my first storm mid-air, or extreme turbulence I have experienced. I’ve shared the emergency landing I experienced at age 16 and the extent of the trauma it left me with. But luckily, this time was different. 

A few years ago, I learnt about positive affirmations; the practise of repeating positive words or phrases. They date back thousands of years and are practiced in cultures and religions all over the world. 

I never truly understood the power of positive affirmations until I began using them to cope with panic attacks, stress and anxiety; particularly when flying. 

Our sympathetic nervous system (SNS) is our internal protective mechanism; if we perceive a thread, it initiates a reaction commonly understood as the fight, flight, or freeze response.

A situation that is perceived to be life threatening (it may, or may not actually be) sets off internal signals. We then create a “trauma response” to that situation. For situations in the future that trigger this same feeling, a memory or similar situation from a traumatic experience, our body sends off those internal signals that “this situation is not safe”. As individuals, we would react to the same situation differently based on our other neurological pathways and trauma response. 

But what if we were able to understand the pathways we have created and re-wire them so when we’re in high stress, or perceived life threatening situations, it doesn’t trigger a trauma response, or the response is not as negative as previously 🤯

I have done a lot of inner-work to understand and release trauma held in the body. One of the most beneficial and easiest tools I use is positive affirmations. 

About 2 years ago, when I felt anxious before and during flights, I began repeating

When there is turbulence, I repeat the affirmation “I am safe, I am happy, I am calm”. At times, I’ve been so scared I’ve cried, but still internally repeated these words. 

Now, months on, I truly believe I have re-wired my brain and it’s trauma response. I have re-wired old neurological pathways to create new ones. Now, when there is turbulence, without thinking about it my brain starts to repeat “I am safe, I am happy, I am calm”. The response is automatic and is much more enjoyable than the old pattern of “I’m about to die”. 

Don’t get me wrong, I still have moments of sweaty palms and a fast beating heart but with my internal dialogue repeating positive affirmations, I am able to easily self-regulate. 

Who else here uses positive affirmations? More commonly, looking in the mirror and telling yourself positive affirmations helps to empower you, increase your self worth and confidence!

Any questions about positive affirmations, or fear of flying, feel free to ask them in the comments below 🙏 

I don’t believe in coincidences and here is an example why!

When you reflect back on incredible things that have just fallen into place, when the impossible becomes possible or things align in a way you couldn’t have imagined, do you think it’s a coincidence?

I was recently flying back from Kos, Greece to London with a stop over in Duesseldorf, Germany. I had a full day of travel; 2.5 hour ferry from Patmos to Kos (because it stops at 4 other islands) then my 2 flights to get me home. The other ladies I was travelling with were staying on another night so I was on my own to get from the port to the airport which is about an hour travel. I’ve travelled solo plenty of times before, no problems.

When on the ferry, I began looking at my flights. Maybe because of the time difference or maybe I just forgot but I only had 2 hours to get from the port to my flight, which is 1 hour in travel. I thought, that’s fine, the universe will have a bus waiting for me. I checked the bus schedule and they came every hour… except when I was arriving, there was a 1.5 hour break. I then received an email from the airline about construction at the airport, to arrive earlier than usual and to expect delays (way to add fuel to the fire, thanks universe).

Instead of freaking out, I came to terms with the fact that the €40 taxi was my only option. So I began telling the ladies I was travelling with that I would find a group of people getting in a taxi and ask if I could share the fare with them. With all the ferry stops I figured I would wait til I got off and ask people at the port.

First taxi I went to was full, the second one had 3 people in it; I asked if they were off to the airport but they said no and closed the door! The third taxi had 3 men putting their bags in the boot. I asked if they were going to the airport and they said yes, then I took a breath and asked if I could join them and split the fare. I’m sure they thought I was crazy but with only a slight hesitation, they said yes. The taxi driver, who was even more confused, said “lady where are you going?” In which I replied “to the airport with these guys”!

I’ve solo travelled a lot, I know what feels safe and what doesn’t. I trust my instincts and this felt safe! I waved goodbye to the ladies and off I went.

In the taxi, we got chatting and not only had these 3 men been on the tiny island of Patmos that I was staying on, they were actually Australian and one was living in London. After some more taxi banter, we figured out we were all the same flight AND they were the row in front of me.

They were so lovely sharing their week in Patmos, their travel plans and even how funny it was we all ended up in that taxi together. I actually think it was the taxi driver who was most shocked! So instead of paying for a €40 taxi, it was €10 each and I made some new friends oh and caught my flight on time!

I told the universe exactly what I wanted and it definitely didn’t disappoint. Coincidence? I think not.

The universe is aligning incredible opportunities in your path constantly. Be aware. Be conscious. Look out for them and show gratitude to increase their frequency. What things have you manifested?

Have you ever stacked rocks at the beach?

Here I was thinking it would make a great photo and is supposed to be all “zen” but my mood quickly changed as I became increasingly frustrated at how difficult it actually is.

As I looked for flat rocks to stack and bigger ones for the bottom etc. I soon noticed when you stack one on top, all the ones underneath started moving, twisting and often falling. It was not like stacking jenga blocks!

I took a deep breath and listened to my internal dialogue. It was saying “what rock should go next” “which ones fit together to then allow the next rock to stack on top to get this finished” and “If I hold the top one and stack them quickly maybe they will all balance”. I lay all the rocks out to evaluate them.

Then it hit me like a tonne of… rocks! This is exactly how my logical brain works. I’m constantly trying to figure out, plan, know what’s coming next and what I should be doing to make everything work out. I sometimes can see I have options, but I can also be blinded and convinced there is only one way of doing things. I’m also working on being more patient. I had a little chuckle to myself when I realised then took a deep breath and started again. This time asking which rock goes next, taking my time, breathing, then I created these!

The gift of the situation?

I have been working on myself these last few years to recognise and let go of control programs we all subconsciously run and replace them with trust. Why do we have control programs? Our ego has the job to protect us and can make you feel like you need to be in control to gain/keep love and if not, instills fear. At the beginning it is difficult to let go of control because your logical mind (or ego as we call it) wants to kick back in and resort to old patterns but on the other side, when you let go and trust, it’s so freeing! It allows space for creative flow, new opportunities and positive change.

Can you think of a moment you found yourself wanting to control a situation then surrendered to the universe? Would love to hear about it and the outcome.

As crazy as it sounds (you know, having a travel business and all) I actually had a massive fear of flying. Here’s my story and how I’ve been working through it…

As life passes by, it’s so interesting what pieces of information our body holds onto and what it disregards, what we are aware of and what lies dormant in our subconscious, waiting to be acknowledged. 

For me, my first trip to Italy at 16 was filled with wonder and excitement. However on the flight back to Australia, I went through what people have nightmares about. 

I’ve heard all the statistics, it’s safer to fly in a plane than to drive in a car and yeah I guess I’m still here to tell the story but at the age of 16, the traumatic experience of an emergency landing left me living in fear, in constant fight mode and enduring countless panic attacks and vomiting from extreme anxiousness, on every flight and even in the days leading up to my flights I was a complete mess. 

From what I remember, I didn’t have a fear of flying before my flight from Milan to Japan. Towards the end of the flight we began to encounter extreme turbulence. Like nothing I have ever experienced to this day (and as you know I fly weekly). The lights began flickering and then the feeling of us literally falling out of the sky which then turned into shaking and what felt like inside down loops (but not the fun thrill-seeker type). Everyone was in sheer panic, including the air hostesses with a sea of vomit all over the isles and not a single dry eye on the plane. The announcements were in Japanese so it was unclear what was going on. This ordeal not only happened once. The pilot flew up higher again then about 10 minutes later, put us all through the experience again (that was just to get the lesson, thanks universe). 

I remember being so still, scared to move. Silently praying, holding hands with my friends but also trying to come to terms with the fact that this might be the last living day I have. It’s traumatic thinking about this but read on (I promise it gets better). 

We eventually did land. I’m not even sure if it was an airport or a field as it was dark and really late. We had to wait hours before they took us to another airport where we slept on the floor until the morning. We later found out we flew through the eye of a category 4 typhoon with winds up to 155km that also caused a landslide killing over 90 people (so I am thankful to be alive). 

You can probably understand why this might have “triggered” my fear of flying. I have never allowed it to stop me pursuing travel but what a dichotomy right? The girl with a travel company had a fear of flying! 

Over the past few years I have done so much work on myself around what this trigger brought me to realise. Funny enough, it’s never about the actual plane trauma but what feelings and emotions it bought up for me and what decisions I made about life in that moment. Themes around the fear of strangers and trust, which are all pretty common have been worked on but the main most recent one a few months ago was actually acknowledgement. 

See, when we finally landed I called my mum hysterically crying, shaking and in total shock. She calmed me down and said “it will all be ok, you’re fine”. She was calm, didn’t really want the finer details but it was comforting to hear her voice. 

But in that moment, with her calm voice, I made the decision that she didn’t care if I died. That even if things were so traumatic and terrifying for me, that it didn’t matter to her. Do I still love my mum? Of course I do! Did I know I was carrying this feeling? Not at all! 

I made decisions around my mum and linked them to flying all those years ago. I had been carrying that fear, laying dormant in my subconscious, waiting for it to be acknowledged. 

In May 2019, on the way to Greece with the help of 2 amazing friends, I got the realisation that this was in fact the link. I did call my mum, shared my realisation as stupid as it sounded and of course she cared. She said “isn’t it funny what your mind decides to make up?” And that’s exactly it. My mind created this decision based on the unsaid, when in fact my mum explained, she tried to stay calm to help me relax and calm down (of course she did)! But my logical mind didn’t take that on board. My ego, my subconscious mind made decisions and when I was on a plane, it reminded me of that fear, sneakily through creating all different scenarios that might happen. 

I don’t know if I’ve “cured” by fear but I have worked bloody hard to overcome it. Since this realisation, I have taken 12 flights, not all have been sunshine and rainbows but for the first time I felt excited about taking off. My internal dialogue was like well this is a new feeling! Is it real? What’s going on?! I can sleep on planes without medication to numb the pain, I feel calm and relaxed and time goes way quicker when you’re not in fear the whole time! 

I will of course continue to work on myself and what fears come up around flying, what feelings I feel on the plane (or before) but I hope this gives you some inspiration that trauma and triggers are all just feelings to be acknowledged and with work things can shift and change.

I don’t think it was “bad luck” to be on that flight. The universe is always trying to give us lessons and feelings to acknowledge and after we have those lessons, we can choose to let go of the fear and with awareness change your perception of the situations around you. 

I’ve shared some strategies I use on the plane to help calm myself down in Conscious Travel Community Facebook Group. Check them out!